youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
