Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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