Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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