girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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