She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
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