ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
