Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
