i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
