dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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