dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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