im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
Let's paint friendship bongs
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
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