Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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