is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
