brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
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