school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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