marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
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