She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
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