wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Randomize
