i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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