Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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