11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize
