Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Randomize
