What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
