why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
