in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
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