So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Randomize
