I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
