ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
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