God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Randomize
