"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
