just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Randomize
