Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Randomize