i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
