the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Randomize
