On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Pants are for mortals
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
