just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
