it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
