p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
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