i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
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