apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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