he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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