Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
