Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
Randomize
