I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I don't think brook has ever known best
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
