sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
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