Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Randomize