i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Randomize