Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize