dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
