my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
